Tonight I Cried

During the last tracks of Body Balance, the relaxation and meditation tracks, I ask my participants to relax and, if they feel like it, to let their minds drift away to the perfect place and time. A moment of perfect peace and happiness, captured just for them, where there is only happiness and peace.

When I let them settle in, I take myself to my place of happiness and it is always the same place.

First, a hand brushing the tops of a full wheat field as we walk forward on a bright summery day.

Then the field opens up and there is a small river with trees on the bank, and I am lying on the grassy bank watching the sun dance between the leaves and sparkle on the ripples of the water.

It has been this way for ages. It has always been the same and I love this place.

And tonight I realised that this hand was my Dad’s.

And I reached up, little me, little bright blond 5-or-so-year-old me, I reached up and I put my little hand in his and we walked to the river together.

I couldn’t see his face, but I could feel his smile.

And there was no way I could hold back the tears streaming down my face. I can’t now, as I write this.

My father passed when I was 7, and I still miss him.

But he is still there.

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2 responses to “Tonight I Cried

  1. Thank you for this post it was touching. Finding your peaceful place, what a gift to have created this memory from somewhere that must hold a great deal of emotion.

    • Thank you for reading. It was quite a surprise. To think all along this may have been a memory, a connection just not made until that moment. I am so at a loss as to what to say about it, other than it’s so happy and so sad at the same time.

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